when one door closes …
This is Boeing, the doors don’t really close lol
When one door pops off mid-flight . . .
It stays closed and locks you in while the battery ignites.
I was gonna say “hope the pilots have car wash mode on” but I don’t wish them ill, not their fault there’s a giant turd waddling around the 747
Ehhhh… But it’s their fault they chose to continue a military career in that position under the giant turd waddler as their commander in chief.
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… another blows out at 20,000 ft?
… a door plug blows off.
They need to join forces and make the Cyberplane!
The Boeing Tesla Cyberplane could be a revolution in aviation:
- First aircraft to use afterburners to overcome lack of aerodynamics
- Heavy and yet strangely flimsy construction
- Cell phones and radar can ignite the battery in flight
- Fuel efficiency can be throttled mid air by shedding parts
Relevant comic?Piloted using a wireless Logitech controller
Remember Elon Musk in Iron Man 2? Phony Stark pitching an electric plane to Tony who says basically, “it’s your idea but we’ll make it work.”
On your first point, the F4 Phantom (aka “the triumph of thrust over aerodynamics”) would like a word.
Don’t forget rusting as soon as it hits a cloud.
“A ‘tragedy’ struck today as the Boeing-Tesla Air Force One and Air Force Two simultaneously rerouted to crash into the headquarters of Boeing and Tesla. The planes were running on Tesla ‘full self flying’ and staffed entirely with Tesla robots piloted remotely by human operators on the ground, so when they exploded only the president, vice president, and their advisors and guests (including Tesla CEO Elon Musk) were killed.”
Make it so.
Nobody tell him!
Let them cook!
I didn’t normally pray. But.
Praying won’t help. Unless…
Please proceed lol
Lmao if a Boeing plane made from scrap parts ends up being the end of Trump it would be really really funny.
They’re intentionally blocking the whistleblower suits against Boeing right now because they have been using scrap parts in their planes for decades in order to meet rushed delivery deadlines.
I hope Trump is on that new plane by next year please lord
Next year? I bet Boeing can push that thing out in 3 months if they really want to AND get executive bonuses for being early.
I would personally buy their stock to counter their value from falling, good deeds must be rewarded
I support this. And while we’re at it, why not give them a cybersubmarine too?
How about we tell the cheeto that the first person to touch the wreck of the Titanic gets dibs over all the priceless bottles of champagne, and the secret gold. Plus, international bragging rights. But you have to physically touch it to count, per maritime law. That’s why James Cameron and Oceangate were trying to get down there.
Tell him Elon can probably build him a sub he can stick his arm out of. And once it’s claimed, it’s possible to raise and restore it, and he can rename it the Trumptanic. The largest and most luxurious liner in the world. Imagine how it would look pulling into harbor in North Korea.
Can we all talk of the true tragedy which is the onion going out of business due to real articles being unbelievable satire.
Yeah! How the hell is the union supposed to compete with reality?
oh. this is going to end well.
Very, very well.
cue Kaylee saying “Don’t fly anything made by Boeing, they fall right out of the sky.”
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This is like Tom (from Jerry) working together with the Coyote (from road runner) to try and get air force one replacements available.
To be clear: musk has nearly no engineering knowledge, whatsoever. He was fired for incompetence and literally all his idea are laughably stupid. At best he’s a scammer who got lucky.
Boeing is a company that allowed greed to fuck it into the ground, literally, multiple times, killing hundreds for which they still haven’t been held responsible.
Having said all that, please, by all means, I’d love to see the result of this freakshow marriage
Flying this administration around on planes “rushed” by Boeing sounds like it might be our best chance at deposing these fucktards…
Best thing that could happen is if it goes down with Trump, Vance, Musk, and Kennedy all on board.
This is like Tom (from Jerry) working together with the Coyote (from road runner) to try and get air force one replacements available
I get what you’re saying, but I’d trust anything Tom and Wile E. Coyote got from Acme over whatever Boeing is putting out these days
“Wings fall off” switch.
As someone that builds the wings, I can whoele heartedly tell you that there probably isn’t a button that makes the wings fall off.
How about a dead man’s switch if the subscription isn’t renewed?
Wings as a Service (WaaS)
Ahhh, probably™
That button was when Boeing cheaped out and stopped making the wings in North America.
Most of the wing structures are made in the good ol’ USA. The machinery required is a scale that no one is willing to invest in, even Boeing…
Okay so what I know is that there used to be a Canadian company that made the wing frame for them. Had a giant CNC machine that would cut it from one aluminum block, even the 747.
What I was told is that they offshored it.
I know that those guys make stuff for Cessna now.
What if they need to replace the wings quickly? Not having a button that makes the wings fall off sounds very inefficient and frankly irresponsible.
Will it be next to the goat sound button?
Wings? What wings? Elon will come out with a wingless plane design like a fucking tuna can and then be praised for his stupidity.
Soon to be known as “Air Farce One”.
Hopefully they’ll be banned from all the airspace over developed countries.
‘Con Air’
The mental image of Phony Stark and Orange Patriot flying around on Air Farce One makes me think somebody should make a Spaceballs-esque show about this administration.
Wouldn’t that just be a documentary though?
Yeah, but the show would be funny instead of sad, uncomfortable, and the root of a lot of people’s existential dread…
If it’s any consolation, some of us watching from abroad are laughing. It’s all we can do to stave off the despair.
I mean, I’m Canadian and live in Scotland, if I didn’t have trans family and friends who are poor, LGBTQ, and absolutely not white, I’d be having a bit of a laugh too. The suffering is still a bit close to home for my likes.
Edit: as below, forgot to add the bit about anyone who’s not a man. Zip2 said female, I will leave it as not a man
I think you forgot “and female”.
Good catch, I absolutely did. Fixt
“Defence”. They trust “defence”/planes to Elon Musk, to Russia’s puppet. Oh shit… I think Boeing airplanes’ security will decrease lol.
It’d be a shame if there was a critical malfunction in flight.
Especially if the new high command were all on board at once.
It would not be shame, it would be a natural consequence.
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