Matt said: “It was a very embarrassing accident. One of the issues with being so large, especially in hot water showers, is that it’s not exactly easy to see my feet.
“Especially when I move too fast, it can definitely mess with my balance, too. As I was rushing to get ready for work, I didn’t see the excess shower gel in the tub because my penis was the only thing in my eye line.
Right, because a fifteen-inch penis is totally going to obstruct your view of both feet and everything else below your waistline, and your dick is totally the reason you clumsily slipped. And you totally aren’t looking for every possible excuse to turn any event of your life into another opportunity to brag about your massive, record-breaking schlong.
🙄
If mine was that big, I’d probably just stare it, too.
Also Tom Segura has a bit about seeing a guy with a large penis
While I appreciate the link, I am absolutely not having that in my watch history. I really don’t want recommendations based on…whatever that is
Oh, c’mon! Where’s your sense of adventure?
It died when my bones started to creak
Mr. Glass?
Feels like it sometimes, ngl
Old age is probably worse, but middle age sucks
Not a very obfuscating username, Mr. Jackson. 🙇🏼♂️
Yeah Tom Segura, yuck
He just described the bulge he sees and then tries to play it off like he wasn’t staring at it. He says dick a bunch, and I think 1 fuck
He just likes to brag & isn’t evolved enough to have a detachable penis.
What a blast from the past!
I don’t even have to clock the link, and King Missile is now playing the hits in my head. 🤘🏼
edit: leaving it, as-is
He does, however, have an enormous penis
Anyone can acquire an enormous penis & just have it on display somewhere to soothe your day.
It takes one to know one, and buddy…you’re not that guy
Thankfully, neither am I. 😅😶
That sounds suspiciously jealous 😏
I’m 100% sure you cannot get an erection if it’s that long, not enough blood in the body to supply it. You should probably get a surgery to make it smaller if you have this
Nah, you wanna blood dope
Thanks, Doc.
if you are a doctor and have knowledge about it I’m happy to be educated, what I said is conjecture of what seems intuitively true to me personally
I am not a doctor, nor was I the one spouting room temp BS with an air of familiarity to the topic. What you’ve posted is a half-thought that, especially since you’re presumably holding a device, could’ve been just as quickly pursued to a citable reference you could’ve shared as part of your, now refined comment.
Think of the children, Doc. 🤌🏼
genuinely looked and there’s not much info or research about extremely large penis actually, if you find something I’m happy to hear it
“Especially when I move too fast, it can definitely mess with my balance, too.As I was rushing to get ready for work, I didn’t see the excess shower gel in the tub because my penis was the only thing in my eye line.
“I slipped on it, causing me to fall out of the tub completely head first and crack my shoulder on the hard floor.I got two fractures as a result.”
Sounds like he slipped on his penis
this guy gets a burn cooking and he’s like “must’ve been because of my enormous penis” trips on the stairs “dick got caught in the spindles it’s so big” gets sleep apnea “my giant schlong wraps itself around my throat when I’m sleeping”
I mean, to be fair… it must be pretty annoying. Chances are he’s not compatible size wise with 99.99% of women. Probably even jerking off is a massive workout. Probably gets lightheaded each time it fills with blood. Seriously… when you’re this far out of the normal range I recon attention is the main positive thing that comes out of the situation (at least for people who like attention). Everything else just seems needlessly difficult.
Probably gets lightheaded each time it fills with blood.
There was an interview with someone who has a record sized penis, and one of the funniest yet saddest moments was him and his wife talking about how she has to be careful and ‘manage’ his erection during sexual activities so he wouldn’t pass out.
I think I would go get a medical license of some kind and solicit blood donations from friends just so I could pump my blood pressure up to avoid that.
Yeah, I might have seen the same interview. I just didn’t want to put the relevant words into a search engine to figure out specifically what I was vaguely remembering.
No one heard about outercourse. There’s plenty of women that would just…why am I explaining this.
I mean, yes there are other ways to be intimate with each other than penetration. However as far as I can tell a lot of men are very attached to the idea of penetration when it comes to sex. I would assume it would feel quite debilitating not to have the option when you really want to have the option. Then again what do I know. I am missing the necessary parts to know what any of that feels like from the male side.
can confirm it’d be low-key existentially horrifying to not be able to plug it in, it’s not just that it feels good but it’s the… symbolic? aspect of it, for me. Like a hug but you can do it while also embracing each other, hell yeah.
Yeah sure. Just find an open-minded man, and give him a prostate massage. And before you know it, he will be whimpering like a bitch. So so many ways. It’s a culture issue.
It’s just curious.
Summary of the article. " By the way I have a massive cock, it is just huge, biggest in the world. Did I say about my massive unit? It is really big…oh I slipped in the shower and broke my arm,…but let’s get back to the massive third leg I have going on. ,"
“Oops, I dropped my magnum condom for my magnum dong”
FWIW, that brand was specifically designed and marketed for average dicks to feel bigger. It’s their whole thing.
It’s a product within a brand, but it actually is larger. You can look up the dimensions if you want.
Not the “ummakshually” you thought it’d be.
This dude has been in the news before, and again for some non-story, but thinly veiled trying to spread as much as possible exactly how long and thick his dong was. I mean good for him (or bad, many women’s vaginas won’t accommodate that), but he comes off as attention-seeker of the lowest order.
Funny story, but the size of my penis is why my balls always get wet when I pee.
Me too!
Unrelated but this newspaper says:
Join our WhatsApp! Our community members are treated to special offers, promotions and adverts from us and our partners
There’s people that are actually saying “hell yes! Send me ads on WhatsApp, here’s my phone number!” ???
The world’s full of 'em, and many others, yep.
there’s people falling in love with chatgpt, or taking medical advice or therapy from it. I’d take someone who gives away their number to receive ads kind of idiot every day of the week over that kind.
I was careless, didn’t look where I stepped, it was totally because of my dick. Let me tell you more about it…
Seriously. Dude is acting like he can’t see the floor because his dick is in the way. Be one thing if he had syncope due to blood flow. Just didn’t look.
…independently measured at [37cm], and a cast of it has been included in a museum in Iceland.
I have questions for Iceland; mostly about how to pronounce ð but we’ll get to that later
a museum in Iceland
a museum? when it comes to phalluses i believe it is the museum: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Icelandic_Phallological_Museum
Something tells me the author knew it didn’t need to be named. 😜
uh, a 14er. Climbers everywhere, rejoice.
The fucked up pronunciation in Icelandic comes from when you put to Ls together, e.g. Eyjafjallajökull. It makes an almost click sound. You can hear it on the wiki below.
Is that flacid or erect length?
Edit: its erect length. When flacid, it was 25cm long
More or less like the english th. Thorn (letter)
Sort of. ð is the Icelandic rendering for both edh and thorn, depending on context. Edh is voiced, thorn isn’t.
It’s the “unvoiced” part that confuses me
V and F are basically the same sound, except V is voiced. Alternate between them like VVVVVVVVVVVVVFFFFFFFFFVVVVVVVVVFFFFFF while touching your throat, you’ll feel the throat vibrate while saying V but not for F
voiced th is like this, that, mother
unvoiced th like thick, thimble, thirty
notice how the voiced th has a buzzing vocalization during the th sound, you can feel your teeth buzzing as you say the th in this
but when you pronounce thirty that buzzing is absent and the first buzzing starts with the i (the vowel is the first voiced part).
similar to th as in the English word thick, or a (usually apical) voiced alveolar non-sibilant fricative [ð̠],[2][3] similar to th as in the English word the
Should do the trick, no?
That’s what she said?
Sadly not.
Truth.
eth, not thorn
It’s pronounced like the “th” in “weather.”
Th
Like a T, but slide your tongue forward a little so it’s against your teeth
do you not have your tongue against the teeth when saying T?
Envious men please remember vaginas do have an ending. Don’t trust hentai, your penis will NOT come out of our mouths
Next you’re going to tell me that piss doesn’t come from the balls? Please.
The cervix is just a door if you knock hard enough.
deleted by creator
We know about the 666 man. Six figures salary. Six inches. Six feet tall.
Nothing about the 5’10 8” $95k guys anywhere
Ok that is the most ridiculous explanation I have ever heard. Do you have to see your feet to know where they are? And how do large busted or pregnant women manage then?
Oof it must suck to be hung that big though. No balls deep in anyone, ever, and careful sex only.
Do people even focus on their body parts that much on the day-to-day? It seems like something that you wouldn’t think about usually.
When you have a 37cm pénis that’s probably all you can think about.
At that size, it better be paying the bills.
I promise it’s a real issue for women.
I have been pregnant but don’t remember falling down because I couldn’t see my feet! I do remember my belly knocking into doorways when I miscalculated though, since it keeps growing.
Oh don’t get me wrong. His excuse is absurd! Because you can move your feet in the shower if something is obstructing your view. My point was that yes having a body part that prevents you from seeing immediately below it can be a nuisance.
Keeps?! How? They didn’t cover that in Sex Ed. 😶
Well until the baby comes out, lol. The things I remember trying that were much harder with the constantly shifting weight distribution were roller skating and cartwheels. Bigger and bigger till the baby punches its way out of your abdomen (since in sex ed they probably didn’t cover that part either).
But seriously, if women can handle that constant change in weight distribution, I am sure a guy with a massive schlong can handle having it without falling over. Unless it has a mind of its own and gets tangled around his legs or something.
Wait, you have busted and/or pregnant women watching your feet?
are all the impressed comments in here from men lol
Men are silly. I have a friend with a gigantic penis (thickness and length) and he’s always very upfront about how terrible it is. It is difficult to find women that enjoy vaginal sex with a man his size and even when he does he has to be very careful to not go too deep as he could injure her. He can only wear boxer shorts, clothes are difficult to fit without looking indecent, and he always wears tights under his bathing suit.
he needs to find cooler pools.
Yeah had woman tell me that she dump a guy because his penis was to big. He tore her vagina and she bleed. She said that shit hurt. Having a huge penis isn’t always flex for women.
He might as well get into porn, but normal woman don’t want a dick that size.
Great story! Had a roommate telling a story of his old roommate in college. This guy was said to be packing a full-sized hair-spray can.
My guy is doing his engineering homework when his roomie stumbles home from the bar with woman. They head straight to the bedroom, of course. After 5-minutes:
“Oh hell NO you’re not putting that thing in me!”
She went straight out the door, still pulling her clothes on.
Poor fella.
Yeah I heard lots of stories just like that. Also when she was telling that story, there was several other women in the room and they all agreed that they don’t want a gaint dick put in them. You see that shit in porn, but that shit isn’t normal.
This reminds me of the lady that played Elvira. She was a Vegas dancer as a young woman and actually lost her virginity to the singer Tom Jones. She said he was huge and completely tore her up to the point that she had to go to the ER afterwards. I’ll try to find the interview.
EDIT:
https://www.huffpost.com/entry/elvira-actress-sought-med_n_6317
Interview, hell she put in her book that I own and read all about their relationship. Everyone should read it. Yes that part was fucked up.
I first heard the story on the Howard Stern morning show as she was being interviewed back in the 90’s.
#BigDickProblems
This is a serious plot point in the novel The Godfather.
I’m packing 7.5", but skinny, and I used to hit bottom with every woman I had sex with. Fun to painful (for the woman) in an instant. A 14.5" schlong would be worse than useless.
Any bigger and he’d need a thorny crown to go with that cross he’s bearin’. Poor bastard. Betrayed by one of his closest friends. PSA: Don’t get Judas’ed by your own dick, y’all.
I’ve had an 11” before - like baby arm girth too. It’s absolutely physically taxing. Not just the “ouch” from cervix bumping but also there’s just something about big penises that make it feel like exercise. 9” is fun but it’s like I ran a marathon.
The world is full of men that can’t see their own feet in the shower!
14.5 inches, what an absolute unit
No wonder he is single and lonely for attention.
In the Godfather novel, Sonny Corleone couldn’t have a decent sex life because of his gargantuan penis until he landed a woman with a deep vagina. I am not making this up.
Dong Corleone
“I slipped on it, causing me to fall out of the tub completely head first and crack my shoulder on the hard floor.I got two fractures as a result.”
You did NOT slip on your penis.
imagine though, just a fuckin garden hose coiled on the floor and WHUP
Were you there to see Matt, 41, owner of the world’s largest penis, slip?
(Also he very clearly says he slipped on some shower gel, not his penis)
He didn’t, he said he slipped on shampoo that he couldn’t see since his penis was obscuring his vision.
That’s a lame excuse. I’m pretty sure my two legs are larger than his penis and I don’t consider my vision obscured by them.
Was he slapping himself in the face or why was it so obscuring his vision?
A better title would be “man so mesmerised by having a large dick, he can’t look away from it even when in slippery spaces”
Still bullshit, how many fast guys just see their bellies, I mean you can support of see his dick in his pants in the image, why would that block the view? maybe it’s just time for some prescription glasses.
OMG it’s real
is there a way to block all posts with links to a specific site?
UBlock origin will let you do this. Come back to this comment in a couple minutes…
Edit: Add something like this to your uBlock Origin custom filters. (The sites I included are all paywalls, but you can substitute your own)
feddit.org.##.title:has-text(/theintercept.com|economist.com|military.com|wired.com|theverge.com|theglobeandmail.com|404media.co|nytimes.com|vox.com|washingtonpost.com|theatlantic.com/)This will turn something like this:
into something like this:
(The “Anker’s Sound” post has had its link and headline hidden)
Reddit Enhancement Suite had FilteReddit, which had more fine grained controls to block posts linking to specific sites. I’ve been looking for a Lemmy equivalent, but UO is the best I’ve found so far.
